Connection

Photo by Jan Kopřiva on Unsplash

“Connection"

Let’s talk about connection. 
 
We all need connection to thrive, and arguably, to survive. Connection can mean many things and look many different ways, but ultimately connection is the feeling of being with another through a safe and authentic experience. We are not connected if we, for whatever reason, do not feel safe and are in survival mode. 
 
Many have experienced complex trauma, or trauma that occurs in relationships rather than events. As a result, we learn to disconnect  from people to protect ourselves. This can look like avoidance, isolation, defensiveness, or anger, to name a few. But the thing is, even though a part of us learns to disconnect to ultimately feel safe, it steals the ability to connect with others who could provide the exact healing we need. 
 
You might try to ignore or even judge the part of you that wants to connect, but the truth is, you are human and of course you need connection. Practice noticing the next time you feel a battle between connecting and disconnecting, and try to consider if your need to connect is there for a reason. As scary as it feels, it might be exactly what you need and could be worth the first step.

Written by Dr. Lacey Wright, PsyD